no nichole’s randomness. just depression

I keep opening up WP out of habit and I want to write here. I want to write here so bad it hurts. The thing is there is nothing I can write about. My world is upside down and I can't write about it here. It's just too painful... There is no sunshine and rainbows and nichole's quirky randomness. My world has turned into obssessing and depressing. I basically stay in bed and try and sleep. or lay there and stare into space. Since friday I have ate: 3 croutons, 3 bites of cookie, 3 crackers, 1 can of beef broth, a piece of toast, a couple bites of pasta, and a bite of chicken fried rice. I keep hydrated for fear of getting something horrible like kidneys shutting down/infection. I drink apple juice and water..tried sprite but fizzy hasn't been my friend I have always been such an open person, and for me not to write what went down and such is killing me, but the thing is I won't ever be able to write it here or anywhere other than a word doccument on my computer.. I just … [Read more...]

I won’t be around.

I am writing to tell you that I won't probably be writing very much or blogging , at least for this week. I have had some issues come up and I am pretty much in a deep depression for real since friday night. It doesn't have anything to do with me and david or anything like that...everyone is safe and healthy but I don't really want to go into details at this point, and maybe not even ever. I appreciate anyone who has commented to me and expressed concern in the last 2 days..I hope you continue to do so!   Thanks So Much Nichole … [Read more...]

i’m out of whack

I am totally out of whack today! David is generally off on Fridays..But...he ended up having to work today! I generally clear up everything i really NEED to get done on today will really be a day to do whatever the heck that I decide it is that I want to do! I *might* try to clean up in my closet a little bit or something like that..I still haven't managed to go through my conference swag lol..I did drag all of it except my elmo and my extra bag to moms a few weeks ago. Of course she did decide to give me a ton of stuff to take home that day and it I had to make a ton of trips in and out of the house to get everything in and we couldn't park in the yard! My closet is always a nightmare though...It stays clean like one day and it's back to royal mess... Nothing planned for this weekend of course..I mean I hope to get to my mom & dads because I didn't get to go over last weekend...hopefully.. In case you missed my tweets and facebook posts the … [Read more...]

That of which was almost a disaster

So back in January I had to rush David to the ER with chest pain...anyone remember all of that? Spent half a night there...I remember it quite vividly but who wouldn't you know? We got bills of course..however with everything being filed on his insurance I kept holding out paying stuff.. We had got a bill for around 3000 and then finally I was getting one for 700 so my dumb self figured that was what the 20% + his deductible and ER visit fee was...and that everything was filed and settled. Because it would have added up pretty close to that... WRONG We went ahead and set up payment on that portion of what I thought was THE BILL...because it came with a note that they were going to turn it over to collections within 10 days of the letter..Anyways..Really friendly folk at the hospital. 30 bucks a month. Thought it was a done deal. Then today I got a bill for 3000 again..and I was like O.K. what is going on? I called the hospital who explained to me (even though I wasn't … [Read more...]

Trying something from Pinterest!(1)

I am trying something from PINTEREST today! That's right from all that obsessive pinning I figure I best try something for once. Which it isn't that I Haven't tried anything from there before but it didn't turn out so well! SO what is it that i'm trying? A recipe? A craft? a general idea? Recipe Wins! I happen to LOVE cube steak. Which apparently makes me odd because from what I have saw people are all "it's tough" and what not. which, I mean it's not like the most tender thing ever but ..I don't know ....anyways... I usually have it breaded and pan fried and with brown gravy and potatoes.. oh wow excuse me while I wipe off the keyboard lol j/k this time around i'm trying it in my crockpot! I seriously ADORE my crockpot and I don't get to use it as much as I want to because I don't quite know that many recipes. this is the recipe I am trying Source: via Nichole on Pinterest   So far's about 30 minutes in and I think it needs … [Read more...]